Breathing easy

I haven't had THAT THING since November 2008, when I underwent THE PROCEDURE. Even though the most obvious physical manifestation has 99.99% disappeared I still "enjoy" some of the other lovelies, particularly CRAMPS. The past couple days I have been unhappily reminded that menopause has not yet been achieved because of the pain (PAIN) emanating from my internal girl parts. Here I am, four months away from my 52nd birthday, un-menopaused.

Another member of the household is on a similar schedule and she very unkindly shares her PAIN with me. It's a long story, one you've heard before, but the saying "misery loves company" must have been written with her mind. Little Miss Miserable was in full sharing mode last night and I was beginning to worry when relief arrived in the form of the big sister who suggested a sleep over. This idea was not immediately rejected (as were all the previous suggestions), in fact it was embraced and off she went.

So at 9 PM I found myself home alone. Everything I might need was near at hand on my new hospital table and I settled myself happily and comfortably in my new recliner. Life was good. I grabbed my laptop and was going to finish yesterday's entry when I started to choke. I don't know what happened -- I suspect when I inhaled I caught a little bit of saliva -- but it was the worst choking episode I've had in ages. It seemed to take forever before I could catch my breath, and even then they were short and insufficient. My breathing didn't return to normal for a good five or more minutes and I must confess that I was scared. The sounds I made didn't help -- like a 50-year three-pack-a-day smoker who struggles for every last bit of air. Very tentatively I took a few sips of water and finally regained some calm, but I was on high alert and it took some time before I was comfortable enough to rest my head on the back of the chair.

Guess what? After this little episode my cramps were gone. I think I'd prefer menopause.