Reaching beyond your grasp

You've heard that before, haven't you? I have always liked that phrase and have tried to live up to it. These days, however, it has taken on new meaning.

One of the unfortunate consequences of having ALS is that you cannot continue to reach beyond your grasp; eventually your reach is limited to a very narrow field. For that matter your grasp goes to hell, too.

This disintegration in the reach/grasp ability affects so many facets of daily living: eating, dressing, showering... and going to the BATHROOM. The time has come for me to prepare for the inevitability that, in the not-too-distant future, I will need assistance. I can't have a procedure (as I did in November 2008) to rid myself of the problem; one must pee after all.

Would that I were David Sedaris -- I would give the old Stadium Pal a try.

Repeated attempts at searching for the Stadium Gal were unsuccessful which leads me to believe there isn't one. Not that it would do me much good anyway. No, it is time to plunk down some moolah on a bidet toilet seat. I was researching them this morning -- it's amazing how many there are to choose from. $25 will get you a four way cap, rubber tubing and a lever to control the force of the stream. I think in this case you get what you pay for and I am prepared to move away from the $25 range. I'm not sure but I think my flexible spending dollars might cover this. I'll have to check. Anyway, I'm looking at the models that offer TWO wands for more thorough cleansing. I would also like a heated seat, water temperature control, a dryer, and a wall mount remote control because all the built-in remote controls are on the right side and that does me no good. I find myself intrigued by the models that offer "pulsating" and "massaging" options. Can you imagine? One might never leave the toilet.