THE ODDS (Debbie Does ALS)


Knight of the round tissue.

Believe it or not I found two stinkbugs in my house last night.

The first one was crawling on my window. I asked Courtney if she would please remove the bug, taking care not to smush it (because we all know what happens when you smush a stinkbug). She did, without incident.

Not long after, we heard something hit the inside of my table lamp. Courtney said it was just a moth, but I said--jokingly--that it was probably another stupid stinkbug. We both laughed, and Courtney said it would probably land on me after I went to bed.

Courtney is a wicked, evil cow. She'd been gone about half an hour when I looked up and saw THE STUPID STINKBUG on my blanket. Cecilia was downstairs with her boyfriend, Alex, so I sent her a text message saying I needed help. She was quick to respond but by the time she came upstairs the stupid stinkbug was no longer on the blanket. Carefully lifting the blanket off my feet, Cecilia jumped and made a face, and told me the stinkbug was on my foot. Knowing she wouldn't be any help, I asked her to get Alex.

Alex is a nice boy. He always comes in to say hello and always stops in to say goodbye. That is the extent of our relationship. I'm sure he was horrified at the prospect of removing a stinkbug from my ALSy feet. But he bravely entered my room, tissue in hand. Poor Alex. The stinkbug was no longer on my foot, it had crawled up onto the side of my shin. Evincing no great disgust, he very ably extricated the stupid stinkbug and summarily disposed of it.

Alex is my hero.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I vacume them up, one day I discovered them on my window, and then realized they had found a way in and spent the next hour emptying my room out and vacuming every tiny space even the underside of my bed. it was a nightmare there must have been at least a hundred of them.
-Jennifer Thull

Twitter Updates

    follow me on Twitter