After the fall

I am in my room, my feet are up, and I'm drinking a nice cold Corona light. This is the best I've felt all day.

I didn't sleep well last night, every time I turned I felt the pull of the bandages and it hurt. When I woke up, I was sore but not as much as I thought I would be. The immediate impact of the fall I felt in my left shoulder. My left arm is my strong arm now, but when I opened the office door, the car door, or tried to lift or move anything, I realized I had banged my arm pretty badly.

Worse yet, I couldn't stop thinking about what Ellen had said at the last support group meeting about how traumatic to an ALS patient a fall is. She said that falling often is so traumatic it adversely affects progression. So, whether my fall was an ALS fall or just a regular fall, it was a fall. No matter how hard I tried today, these thoughts kept running through my head. It scares me to think I might have done something that will make me even worse.

I must, I will push this stuff out of my head.

I managed to shower tonight, sans bandages. Since I'm not in freak out mode like last night, the scratch doesn't look as terrible. It ain't pretty, and I've got some bruises already forming, but it's less deep than I thought it was. There's also a bruise on my hip and my shoulder. I am a ravishing beauty!

I suspect I will be a bit more sore tomorrow; the second day after a marathon is usually the most painful. And I know my left side will be less functional for a day or so. I also know this will improve because, fall trauma notwithstanding, my left arm is still strong.

Now I must watch as the Terps spiral downward again, then to bed. Sweet dreams.