To the man in the red car behind me as I was coming in to the garage: I'm very sorry if my (lack of) speed in getting through the gate caused you a 3 second delay in getting to your parking spot, then to your office. On the plus side, however, had I not been so slow in getting out of your way you would not have enjoyed the arm waving exercise you performed, rendering you a more fit individual. I tried to wave back but, since the only arm I can raise with any authority is my left, you likely did not see it as it was too near the door.
You may also consider yourself lucky that it takes me so long to get out of my car because I was formulating a lovely, early Monday morning rant to which you would have been subjected. As my children (and scores of people in the service industry) can tell you, I am the queen of providing feedback -- both positive and negative.
Initially I was angry that you were impatient because I am slow. It occurs to me that I am at risk of being impatient because you are slow -- slow witted, that is. So I will take the higher road and forgive you for being a total idiot.
4 hours ago