THE ODDS (Debbie Does ALS)


3.21.2009

Dreamin'

I was at clinic. It was a bare-bones staff -- only nurses -- and the rooms didn't even have tables. It was like they were preparing to relocate. I walked around a U-shaped turn and saw a man, dressed in a suit, sitting on the floor. He was supposed to help me, but I wasn't sure how. We had a nice conversation and I excused myself, saying I had to go back to my room. I was so tired when I got back to my room, I wanted to rest. As there was no table I knelt on the floor and fell asleep.

The next thing I know, I'm outside riding my bike. I'm able to ride my bike without any problem and I'm enjoying the beautiful weather and all the scenery. I rode through a new shopping center and saw a restaurant I knew Lynne would be happy to see. I kept riding and finally came out on Lafayette Blvd., down near the Spotsylvania Courthouse. I was delighted because this meant it would be easier for Lynne and I to connect for a run. Tons of people were out, many of them members of the running community. I weaved my bike in and out and then discovered there was something going on with the right handlebar -- it was loose and was not connected properly. I got off the bike and flagged down a man and asked him to help. He was somewhat offputting but did agree. He reminded me of my old podiatrist, Dr. Pribut. As this man was loading my bike, I was on a clinic table. What was odd was the man was also changing clothes. He finally finished and drove away with my bike.

I found myself in a building much like a gym or pool locker room -- all cinderblock and toilets. I saw many of my friends who were there to attend a swim meet. I knew Lynne would be there to watch her daughter Stephanie. But then everyone was gone. My clothes were sweaty from my bike ride so I thought I should change. I went into a stall but it was so nasty I had to leave before I got sick. I found a clean one and took off my sweaty clothes. But I had nothing else to wear. I began to cry because I had no clean clothes, no bike, no phone, nothing. All I had was this strange cylindrical device that would only sporadically pick up radio signals. Crying, I put back on my sweaty clothes.

Then Melinda was there, with a chocolate chip cookie casserole. The edges of the casserole would not stay down, but Lynne's daughter Stephanie was able to fix three of the four edges. I was lamenting the loss of my bike when the man who had taken it drove by. He was driving a Porsche that was painted orange and white. He called to me to tell me that the paint had been chipped. I told him I didn't care about chipped paint, I just want the handlebar fixed. He said it wasn't the bike's paint, it was the car's and it happened while he was loading the bike so I had to pay. I thought to myself the only thing I could do at that moment was give him a business card, so he'd know I was legitimate.

I was also beginning to panic because I was not able to contact my clinic to tell them where I was. I was so upset about the car and the clinic, I could feel the anxiety even in my sleep.

Then I woke up. The dream was so fresh in my mind and I was so relieved I didn't have to deal with any of it. I had to put this all down before I forgot.

Time for a wog.

I had a great run. I got out later than I had hoped, but it didn't matter. I knew if I was home by 10:20 AM I would have time to clean up before my hair appointment. I ran for what I thought was about 30 minutes, then turned around and came back. When I got in the car and saw that I'd been out for almost 90 minutes, I was shocked. I haven't worn a watch in a long time but maybe I need to start. Clearly I am running slower than I thought.

While I was running I kept chiding myself for being tired. I told myself if I didn't pick it up I'd never be in marathon shape again. I crack myself up!

Having run longer than I anticipated, I had to rush right over to the salon. I hope my poor stylist wasn't too offended by my rankness.

So, back to the dream. What I most remember is the feeling of elation I had while riding the bike. I was strong, I could feel the air, I could feel the sun, I was so happy. The last time I rode a bike was this time last year. I had run the shamrock half marathon (as a bandit, but so what) and then hopped on my bike to find Lynne. I ended up riding approximately 21 miles, after which my right hand and arm were so sore I decided it was better to give up biking.

I must go pack. Overnight in Virginia Beach for the marathon. Lots of my friends are racing. This might be tough.

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