THE ODDS (Debbie Does ALS)


Mother's little helper

I'm working from home today, stopping just now to have a sandwich and put some things down on virtual paper.

The last several days have been rather a trial; Cecilia seems to be experiencing greater anxiety and her reactions are worrisome in that she has become physical with me. We had a terrible day on Saturday and another miserable night last night.

Consequently, I am rethinking the use of some sort of medication to calm her anxiety. I have never been one to resort to a pill, thinking it unnecessary; I've always felt that doctors too often pop a pill into a child's mouth to make them fit into a prescribed niche. After the events of the last several days, however, I'm beginning to think there may be some value in using the proper medication for a specific issue.

One problem I have not been able to solve is teaching her to be flexible and to accept alternatives. So often her anxiety stems from unmet expectations, expectations she creates and that are not easily achievable. In that way she is her own worst enemy.

She has so many things in her life and on her mind: being 16, demanding academics, unfulfilled romance, and her Aspergers demons. Add my idiot "condition" into the mix and you have a recipe for anxiety and unhappiness. My beautiful, intelligent, creative, darling daughter should not have to go through this and it breaks my heart to see her in such anguish.

She sees her doctor tomorrow. I know there is no magic pill, but hopefully there is the next best thing.

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