A rose is a rose...

Tramadol. Nothing more needs to be said.

I met with a private hire aide last night. Her name is Rose and she has experience with other ALS patients. We are going for a test run tomorrow night and will set up a regular schedule when I return from the City of Light.

Things to consider:
First of all, the cost. None of this will be reimbursed as I am still in my "elimination period." I think I will be limited to one night a week for four hours a night, which I'm hoping will alleviate some of the burden from Jenny. If I time everything properly and call on a couple of friends, I think we can get through the next several months. I'm keeping my fingers crossed (which, if you have seen me do that lately, is rather amusing).

Next, I have no idea how this actually works. I suppose she will help me do all the things I can't do--food preparation and laundry and the like--but I feel very strange about asking even though I expect this is what she is supposed to do. It's one thing to ask your children for help, it's quite another to ask a stranger. But I will be paying her to help, so I'm being ridiculous.

From a personal care perspective I am less uncertain. I am actually looking forward to having someone I did not give birth to help me after my shower. Having spent a significant amount of time in communal locker rooms it is interesting how modest I am around my children. I do not have any reservations about Rose assisting me with toweling off, applying lotion, or getting dressed. I am actually eager to see how quickly this process can be completed.

You know, it may be such an agreeable arrangement that I will want to engage her for two evenings a week -- an enormous expense. I will figure it out somehow, I suppose. For now, I will start with one time a week.

One other thing -- Rose is a private hire aide and my long-term care insurance requires I go through an agency. I'll need to keep this in mind and not become too fond.