THE ODDS (Debbie Does ALS)


3.15.2008

What does THIS mean, I wonder?

More strange dreams. My recollection of last night's is disjointed, but what I do remember is this:

I'm at a lunch counter with lots of people, mostly people I know. I don't have enough money to pay for my sandwich and and am looking for any odd cash when all of a sudden I find my credit card and tell the waitress to put everyone's lunch on my card. The bill is paid and we all leave, but everyone leaves behind odds and ends, which I end up collecting. There are so many things I have a hard time carrying it all until Adam's father, Jeff, comes to my aid. From there we get into a car (the group is smaller now, but Adam's parents are still with me) and we drive up a hill to another store and discuss buying a bottle of wine, which we do not.

Continuing along in the car (now with another friend, Colleen), we drive through a neighborhood where I often run but stop at a huge white house with bright turquoise shutters and doors. Walking along the side of the house I see through the windows a ton of people--adults and children--all busy living life.

Then I find myself in another house, a very small house. There is a repairman there and I ask him to fix the garage. Immediately the garage becomes a room, a sunroom I guess, which I can make larger or smaller with the push of a button. When the button is pushed the floor creaks and moans and the room is transformed. Preferring the smaller room, I push the button and, while the house is being driven down the highway, it decreases in size. I am very worried about the safety of this maneuver but nothing happens. When we stop I discover the driveway has regularly spaced cracks which, when folded or unfolded, cause the room to change size.

More people arrive, young people who are either my friends or my daughters' friends, all dressed in winter caps and coats, they are all smiling and happy and so very kind. We are back at the white house which is still full of people. I go into the back of the house where there is pool (indoors) and I sit by the water, not a stitch on, and worry for a moment people will see me. Another room just beyond the pool is locked but has a window in the door. Inside there is a pedestal with an object, like a smallish, glowing, amber light, sitting on top of it. I'm told the only person who can go into this room is the person with the code. I'm surprised to realize I have the code but I don't go in because I don't have any clothes on and I don't want to be seen.

I feel like there's more but I don't remember.

Anyway, it's Saturday morning. I checked my email and saw the regular message from "Living with ALS." This is a yahoo message board I subscribed to. At first I tried to read everything but became discouraged. I know I need to know about cough and suction machines and wheelchairs and feeding tubes and all the rest but I'm not ready yet. Now I scan the topics and only read what's interesting--which isn't much.

Sun's out, Shamrock road trip is imminent, going to see Becky and John's new house--think it'll be a good weekend. Unless I end up at a house with a pool and don't have any clothes.

No comments:

Twitter Updates

    follow me on Twitter